Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Not just a Mommy . . . a WIFE too!

I hope I am not the only woman on this earth that sometimes forgets that not only am I a Mommy, but a Wife too.  Or maybe it is just me!

I have been apart from my husband more than we have been together since we were engaged so maybe it's just different for me.  When I became a Mother, my ENTIRE world changed.  She became my #1 priority in life and my husband was deployed so I think I forgot how to be a wife.  When he came home, we both had to re-adjust to our new life together and with only a few bumps in the road, we figured things out then . . . he left again.  As I am preparing my house, my heart and my brain for yet another transition period, I am scared out of my mind.  I have had some "Mommy time" to reflect, read and pray so that has settled my heart a little but I am back to not sleeping and my tummy is a complete mess.  I get butterflies just thinking about wrapping my arms around my best friend, the love of my life and I CAN NOT WAIT!

I want to be that woman that he fell in love with, I am a Mother now and not much else has changed other than I have a smaller chest and waist size, my hair is darker and my patience level has drastically increased and I have also learned to love and be loved.  I have to remember that my husband needs me too, emotionally, mentally and physically (even when I am exhausted) he needs me!

Please pray for us if you can.  Nervous, excited and scared at the same time!


Expat Girl said...

I totally understand and this is one of my biggest fears for when the hubby gets back

Kelly Glupker said...

It can be hard to remember that we are first called to be our husband's helper before we are called to be Mothers. Being a wife needs to be our number one priority. Marriage is for life and if we want it to be good we have to be intentional. I can't imagine having to go through the transitions you do, but you are a WISE WOMAN for recongizing that your husband needs you. God created him to need you. He created you to be his helper. Good for you for making that a priority in your life!

j said...

You are so sweet...your heart is in the right place! I think I got butterflies for you just thinking about you being able to give your husband a big hug.

Marriage is so much about compromise. One of the best things someone ever told me is to "spoil your spouse and THEN spoil your child." It is so true and your child(ren) will reap the benefits of this. We (mom and dad) are a blueprint for marriage to our kids. Isabell will learn from you to put her husband first,to cherish the relationship, sacrifice even when tired and to CHOOSE to love even when our tanks are running on empty.

Our pastor once preached a sermon on marriage and the coventant of marriage. It's not a business deal or agreement that keeps record of who does what for whom. It's a covenant in which we promise to give our all even when the other person isn't, or is unable to do the same in return. We give them our best daily without expectation. Because never in a marriage will it ever be equal. There will always be one of us (at one time or another) who is more tired, or sick, or weak, etc. Love keeps no record...and it certainly never fails.

Yes, enjoy being a wife, even when your identity feels consumed of being "mommy."

On a sidenote, listening to Chirstian talk radip this week they said that one of the keys to a successful marriage is "How you respond to good news." (Not bad news, but good news). When our spouse shares something with is that thrills or excites them and we respond in the same way with encouragement and excitement, it does something to strengthen or bond together. It tells the other person they matter, their interests and dreams and passions are important to us and that we are in this life together, sharing it all.

I thought that was really interesting and practical advice we could all take to heart. Thought I'd share!

Praying for you. You are a strong, beautiful WIFE and Mommy!